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" Do you want to shower or freshen up your make up before I alert the media?" Alert the media? What are you talking about?"Well Camryn, we both know that I'm not functionally capable of making you pregnant so we need to let everyone know about the long awaited Second Coming." Don't be facetious. You know full well what my being pregnant means." Who is the lucky daddy?" I don't know." You don't know? That sounds suspiciously like there has been more than one lover in your life." There have been several and they weren't lovers. All they were, at least to me, were sperm donors and there were several because I didn't want to know who the father was." That sounds like you set out to get yourself pregnant." I did." If you felt the need to have children why didn't you come to me? They can reverse vasectomies these days." I didn't have time." Camryn, will you please just tell me what the hell is going on and get it over with. Don't make me drag it out of you a little at a time." Your mother. Janne’s parents were all for it, and Dad was dead so he had no opinion but Mom was less than enthused that I was marrying Janne, who she had always refused to refer to as my partner, calling him my friend and asking me why I wasn’t dating my friend Anette, the lead singer from Nightwish., and why wasn’t I a good little straight boy like my brother.I finally responded by saying, “Mother, I love Janne and someday I will marry him. You don’t tell me who to love. I didn’t tell you not to marry Sami (my stepfather) even though I hate his fucking lazy ass! And that shit with not letting Janne in your house will stop or I WILL disown you like the bitch you’ve become lately!,” to which my mother replied, “Disown me if you wish, but that man is never welcome in my home!” So, I disowned her and started spending my family time with Janne’s folks, who at least love and accept us both.But that had been 6 months ago, and I was now preparing for the biggest day of both of our lives. As was Finnish.
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